being completely tore up....

as only good literature can do. 

so basically, i read the hunger games by suzanne collins like two months ago but then couldn't afford the next two so i have been agonizing about it ever since. HOWEVER, my mommy {being the awesome mommy that she is} bought the trilogy in hardback for my birthday.

....

SQUUUUUEEEEEEE!!!!

*ahem*

anyway, i read catching fire today and HOLY. SHIT. not only was it a completely amazing story, but started out on a high and just kept climbing. there was not a single boring sentence or an unimportant passage and there were moments when everything was so frustrating and unjust that i literally fell apart {in public no less, dear me!} crying for pages at a time, knowing that nothing could possibly improve the situation and that everyone is doomed and that all will end in sadness and death. 

and THEN! 

shit. goes. crazy. 

this is seriously so far one of the best trilogies i have ever read {i don't want to say best yet because i still have to read mockingjay, but it's becoming a real possibility}

i am so emotionally invested in these characters and torn just as much as katniss about the choices that she has to make and i want so badly for things to end well, but i just don't think they can, and if  they can, i am VERY excited to see how collins is going to bring it about because her writing can make whole worlds for me; worlds that have no possible way to exist and have seemingly no right to exist, but that are so real i can smell the coal and taste the salt and feel the pain of the people i am following. 

ugh. it all just makes me so frustrated that i can't stand it. i will probably plow through mockingjay tomorrow because i LITERALLY couldn't put this one down, i can only imagine how hard it will be with the final installment. 

so for now, all i can say is:

i am freedom in panem

moving on. 

HOLY CRAP THE COAST GUARD WAS ON THE FERRY TODAY.

whew. ok. let's elaborate a little. 

so i got on the boat and i was reading catching fire and i had my headphones in and i wasn't really paying attention to anyone or anything around me. however, when you are walking and reading and have a coffee in your hand, you gotta look up sometimes, right? right. so i do as i am walking onto the boat and i glance up to see a guy in like, a really weird bullet proof vest type vest watching us all board.

weird. 

but, what ever.

so i snipe out my favourite seat {we are back on the kaleetan and off the damn walla walla so i know where my seat is. BOOyah} and i sit down and i am reading {HELLA reading} and i am listening sort of vaguely to my 'i just wanna sing' mix, and all at once, about five minutes into our trip, i notice something a bit off. something that sort of makes the little hairs on the back of my neck stand up. i look up and there are four or five guys walking around all suited up and with gear and fuckin' m16's and shit and the reason that i got the uncomfortable feeling was because i could hear, through my loud headphones, the fact that everyone on the boat was silent. SILENT.

now, these weren't like crazy psycho killers or anything. it was the coast guard. but people are so quiet and nervous in the way that can only be caused by people walking up and down the rows with GIANT. FUCKING. GUNS strapped to them. doesn't always matter that they are 'good guys'. sometimes it just matters that you are completely impotent to do anything, anything to protect yourself should shit get out of hand. 

so that was MY commute this morning. and on my walk i just read the whole way so i got to work in what seemed like no time and didn't even get hit by any cars ^_^

that's all i really want to talk about at the mo'.

OH! except that if you need a roomie in seattle untill may, i would LOVE to be that person. contact me. SERIOUSLY.

and now i leave you with this bit of wisdom:

'Don't be a pawn in somebody's game. Find the attitude which gives you the maximum strength and the maximum dignity, no matter what else is going on'

cheers!

~*~

DFTBA